As a person with severe and very frequent seizures, I am constantly in fear of other people’s lack of knowledge about my condition. There are a lot of epilepsy myths and whenever someone has a seizure, there is ALWAYS some self important douche that insists he/she knows what she is doing because they took a semester of nursing school in 1976. I have had seizures in public places many times (my seizures are almost daily) and I have had people try to stick dirty spoons in my mouth, their wallets, rolled up cloth napkins and all sorts of gross and dangerous things. I have had people start praying because they think I am possessed by the devil (seriously), and I have had people put me in their car and drive me to their home (which is terrifying, and sort of kidnap).
One of the worst parts about having epilepsy in my opinion is having to trust other people, usually strangers, not just because I don’t trust strangers but also because I don’t feel ok about putting a responsibility in their hands that they did not sign on for. Because my seizures are almost daily, I am almost always accompanied by my husband or a friend or assistant who knows how to deal with my condition and has agreed to do so, but I can’t be watched 24 hours a day.
This evening, I went shopping with a friend who is a bit shy and not very assertive. (She is lovely, I adore her, but she is not used to people’s reactions when I have a seizure. She did not know that there is always that one self important douche in every crowd.) I had a seizure. Of course, that one self important douche was there - a man in his late 50’s who insisted on putting something in my mouth; in this case his wallet which had a metal closure and frame that covered most of it. My friend repeatedly asked him to stop and he did not. Unfortunately, my friend was not very assertive (not her fault, she is just sweet and shy) and the guy pushed her out of the way and took over, even as she explained that you’re not supposed to do that with epileptics. He insisted that in the army in the 70’s, that’s the way it was done. My friend argued that this was not the army, nor the 70’s, but he would not listen and she kind of froze up.
The result is that I now have seven stitches in the side of my left cheek and a chipped front tooth, both caused by the man’s metal wallet cutting my face open.
Please, if you know someone with a seizure disorder, take a few minutes to learn how to deal with a seizure. It isn’t complicated and your knowing and being ready and ok with helping will relieve a lot of fear. Please take the time to pass this on, as it could save someone’s life, or at least their face.
It’s also important to remember not to hold us down. Seizures look scary (I’ve never seen what I look like having one, but I’m very aware of what happens), but holding someone down while in status epilepticus is dangerous both to you and the fitting person.
It’s far more safer to let us flail, drool everywhere and pee ourselves as is so flatteringly common, and then comfort us as we come around, explaining what happened to us.
Far too often I’ve come out of a seizure with someone who did first aid in 1980 putting their entire bodyweight on me. Let me tell you, it’s fucking terrifying. I’ve become aggressive when post-ictal, and once gave the first aid officer at my old work a job in the mouth when she wouldn’t get off me.
Someone coming out of a seizure may be unpredictable. It is far safer for you, as the bystander, and the person fitting, to simply clear the area, make sure their head is protected and then wait for them to come out of it, at which point you can reassure them.
So, last night, I was getting ready to go out with my boyfriend to a dance at my school (which was cancelled due to lack of ticket sales) and, I had a nice black vest and a nice white shirt, and my uncle had just came home the other day from the mine (my uncle is homophobic and he has abused me many times throughout my child hood) and when I had came out of my room to show my memere how nice I looked, my uncle was in the room that i thought my grandma/memere would be in (she was downstairs doing laundry), and he asked me why I wasnt wearing a dress.
my memere and dad both know that I am transgendered and they respect that, however, my uncle does not, and he did not know.
so I decided to sit down and tell him the truth.
he listened carefully and quietlly through all of it, but at the end of my explanation he had said, “I didn’t raise you to be fucked up.”
I agreed, I am a huge mess, I have been for years, but my sexuality and gender identity is not a fuck up, so I argued with him.
he got to a point where, after so many months of piece, he slapped me.
and threw me to the ground and kicked me in the stomach, of course I had puked, and it hurt, a lot.
he grabbed me by the shirt and asked me, “are you a girl”, I said no, my sex is female, but my gender is male..and he dragged me to his room.
he once had a big dog, and he made that dog wear an eletrical dog collar, and weve always kept it in his room, because we dont need it (my uncle killed the dog), he threw me onto the bed and said,” ill ask you one more time, are you a girl” I said no.
held grabbed my wrist, and held onto it tightly, I have a bruise from how tight he was grabbing it, and he pulled out the dog collar, threw me back onto the bed, sat on me, and put the collar on me… then he began yelling, are you a girl, you are a girl, are you a girl, you are a girl, and my response of course was no, no, no, I am male, I am male.
whenever I said that, he would shock me, and it was /hell/.
I was screaming, which only caused the shocks to get worse and worse, and then he said, “do you want to find out how faggots have sex!?” of course I already know this, but still I said no no no no stop stop stop.
my memere had finally heard me and came rushing to the bedroom, and tried to make my uncle stop, but he pushed her down, and thanked god she was okay.. since shes very fragile and all.
she then ran back to the stairs to call up my dad, and oh boy did he run.
he ran up stairs and shoved my uncle away from me and started fighting with him, yelling, punching, kicking, and such so on.
my memere got the collar off of me and brought me into her room, and after my dad and uncle were done fighting, my uncle had grabbed the things he needed and left, shouting a few insults at us.
we called the police today, but they cant find him.
we dont have money for a lawyer, all we have is a counsellor, im not going to ask for money, all I ask for is support.
I dont know what this will do, but please spread this around, this has affected me and family members greatly. I was taken to a hospital today to check if there was any damage on my insides that we dont know of and thankfully there was no damage, just scarring, emotionally and physically. i had a horrifying nightmare relating to this as well.
If you have abused somebody, raped somebody, insulted somebody, in any way possible, I hope this can somehow change your way of heart, and realize how much this can horrify a person, and ruin their lives. it made my life 97x worse than it already is.
So I just need to get this off my chest:
For me David Kawena from Lilo and Stitch is the ultimate Disney prince because he is there for Nani AND Lilo and even Stitch despite everything that’s going on in their lives. They’re going through some tough stuff. Their parents die and all of the sudden Nani has to be a mom to her sister who is socially awkward and depressed and that’s hard enough as it is and then she gets her this ‘dog’ and everything gets harder and even though she can’t return David’s feelings he’s still there for them through everything. Even aliens. He’s amazing. I was watching Lilo and Stitch with my niece the other day and I cried watching David go through it all. He is the perfect guy. Like I just get emotional thinking about him.
Imagine if you had someone like David in your life - male or female. You would feel like a prince/princess even if you were living with next to nothing.
David is the ultimate Disney prince - even though he isn’t a Disney prince. He should be considered one.
Disney rant - over.
Reminder that David:
-has no curse to break
-does not have a deadline/ultimatum to find a wife
-has no financial/social gain from being with Nani
-is told 1/4 of the way into the movie that Nani is too busy to worry about dating him AND PROCEEDS TO BE HELPFUL AND SUPPORTIVE ANYWAY.
David’s not a Disney prince because he’s too fucking awesome for that title.
AN ACTUAL NON-IRONIC,NON-SELF DESCRIBING NICE GUY.
A PROPER HUMAN BEING.
for a second when i read i have to get this off my chest i thought it was a pun about the castle on lilo
cultural appropriation 101
Seriously guys, wearing a war bonnet without having to suffer blood, sweat and tears for it is so disrespectful to all the servicemen who have sacrificed their lives for this country.
Finally someone stands up for my people and puts it into words that i couldn’t. Thank you!!!
I love the smell of cultural sensitivity education in the morning.
Wow I never knew these were given to the troops. Makes me proud, America
THANK YOU. My great great grandmother would have hugged you.
#this is not an exaggeration okay #children do say this #children do wonder why they can’t find themselves in the media #don’t fucking tell me it doesn’t matter #it matters so much #children NEED to see themselves represented #or else they grow up feeling inferior and not worthy
depression is like trying to peel a potato with another potato its not fun it doesnt work and you just wanna cry
…why is this such a good metaphor what the fuck
i reblogged it before but then it got better